Going in for the first kiss

Going in for the first kiss

Going in for the first kiss is a big thing. It’s something that you want to get right the first time around, as if you don’t, then there may not be a 2nd opportunity.Sometimes it isn’t the kiss itself, it’s the body language that has been building up behind it that’s important. Let me explain!



Time to pucker up!

Peck on the check between a coupleThere is no timing rule about going in for the first kiss, whether it’s after the 1st date, 2nd, 3rd. Although, personally I think just a ‘peck’ on the cheek on the first date is what gentlemen do and should do.  Really about going in for the first kiss is about assessing the ladies body language. This is largely going to give you the ‘green’ light or not. So, these are the things that you should be assessing

Have you already touched? By this I mean have you held hands, brushed against her arm, rested your hand on the small of her back?

… Okay, then ask,

How has she reacted when I’ve done this?

Has she allowed it? How long has she allowed the contact?

Has she pulled back from it?
If she has pulled back from it or moved away from you (and only by a bit) then she is telling you only 2 things:

A) She isn’t ready to be kissed.

B) She doesn’t actually like you in that sense and doesn’t want to take things further.

So I’m sorry but if you go in for the ‘kiss’ when she has given you either of the above singles of pulling back, then you are asking for rejection.
I’ve been in a situation when I was on my 3rd date with a guy and our legs brushed, I instantly pulled back from him. I was seriously interested in him but just wasn’t ready to be touched at this stage. Also, for some women that have not been romantically involved with a guy for some time, these kinds of experiences she needs to get used to once again. Don’t be too quick to judge and give her the room.


The Analogy

Reading & researching into relationships is something that I love to do and I want to share this excellent analogy, it was put out for women who want to move into relationships quickly, believe me, there is a lot here that we are just pre-programed to do as women! However, I’ve reversed this for men, to come in on your angle.

Couple out on date and embracing and having funWomen want to develop a relationship usually with some speed when they have decided that they want to be with you. Why? because this makes us feel safe, we are very emotive and we want to experience the feelings that come from being in a relationship. But as a guy you are probably thinking, slow down!!! We’ll women are exactly like this when you are coming on strong at the beginning! As women,we want to slow down and step away, this means if you are trying to kiss us or be intimate with us very quickly, then we are going to back off. We still don’t know you yet and the majority of women looking for a serious relationship will want to take this much slower than a guy.


So going in for the first kiss is important, just make sure that you’ve checked in with the ladies body language beforehand. It’s not something that you can just ignore. Use this as the ‘green’ or ‘red’ traffic signal.